


Rainfall

by LunaStories



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Hurt/Comfort, Insomnia, Light Angst, M/M, Nightmares, Rain, Super Soft, Water
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-27
Updated: 2019-11-27
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:27:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21579118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LunaStories/pseuds/LunaStories
Summary: Some days are harder than most, and when it rains, it brings Steve and Tony closer together. They find something in common, and learn that they don't have to go through it alone. Not as long as they have each other.~~Steve’s eyes were distant as he stared over Tony’s shoulders. “I don’t remember much from my time in the ice. Just the cold. But some days, I can feel it pressing down on me. I imagine that’s how dying feels like, caught in the moment and helpless to do anything about it.”
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 6
Kudos: 101





	Rainfall

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!! The kind comments and just general interactions from my first Stony fic were so amazing that I just had to edit and get this fic out as soon as I could. I was in the middle of exams (still am, last one is tomorrow ahhh) and your kind words were one of the few things keeping me going. Thank you for that, it's really humbling (and scary) going into a new fandom but I received a warm welcome and it makes me want to write more Stony haha. 
> 
> I would like to give a big thank you to my beta reader [BuckyAboveEverything](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BuckyAboveEverything/pseuds/BuckyAboveEverything) who is the best and helped me a lot with my Stony fics. 
> 
> And as always, thank you to Dragon for being there for me as I scream endlessly into the void about the struggles of writing.
> 
> It's raining where I'm at right now, so it's rather fitting to upload this fic today haha.

It was raining again. 

Steve stared at the ceiling, back straight and stiff as he lay on the bed. Stark tower had top of the line technology, but his enhanced hearing still picked up the light ‘plink’ of rain against glass, muffled by the windows. The quiet sounds blurred together, until they resembled the rushing roar of water, the coldness of the ocean and the choking dread he’d felt as his plane dived. 

He sat up. 

The clock blinked _4:32 AM_ at him from his bedside table, and other than the soft glow of the city streaming in from his windows, it was dark. His eyes were heavy, but he knew sleep wouldn’t come for him. Not that he wanted to sleep. He’d learned that the darkness of night only reminded him of the persistent stasis he’d been in. He’d slept for over six decades, and every time he fell asleep, he couldn’t help wondering if he would wake up again. 

He sighed and got out of bed, a shiver running through him as the trickling of rain felt like water on the back of his neck. The serum ensured that he was rarely affected by the weather, but that was physical. 

Another shudder, and he pressed his lips together as he reached into his closet and pulled out a hoodie. He threw that on top of his shirt and tugged on a pair of sweatpants. 

It didn’t help. Really, there was nothing that Steve could do about the cold and the persistent nightmares, but if he didn’t try something he was afraid he’d really snap. He stood there, eyes unseeing as he stared into the dark closet. He clenched, then unclenched his fists, trying to steady the tremble in them. 

Drowning was one of the worst ways to die. Nobody ever talked about it, but it wasn’t the water that killed you in the end. It was the cold. The cold that shocked you into taking a deep breath, the cold that seeped into your pores and numbed you to the point of complacency. 

The cold that took away years and years, keeping him on the edge of death. 

Steve closed his eyes. 

His blood felt sluggish, slow and steady. Cold. 

“Is everything alright, Captain Rogers?” 

Steve looked up at the ceiling after another dazed moment, trying to focus. “Yes.” 

There was a skeptical silence. 

“Would you like me to call someone for you?” 

_Yes._ He wanted to say. _Yes I’m okay. Yes I’ll fight your wars for you. Yes, of course I’ll do it. It’s what’s right._

“No, JARVIS. I don’t want to bother anyone,” Steve said instead, turning to leave the room. “I’ll be down in the gym, if anyone needs me.”

It was an off-handed offer, one he knew that nobody would take him up on because no reasonable person was awake this late, but he couldn’t help offering it anyways. He might be reluctant to ask for help, to ask for some company, but if the team came to him he wouldn’t turn them away. 

When he arrived at the gym it was lit up in preparation for his arrival. There was a stack of bandages on one of the benches and he wrapped his knuckles in them. Then, he turned to one of his special reinforced punching bags and hit them with all the strength his sleep-deprived body had.

It was rhythmic in a way that was so much harsher than the sound of rain. A steady, ‘thump, thump, thump’. Like a heartbeat, a rush of blood as he finally started feeling warm again. He reveled in the pain in his knuckles. It was proof that he was alive. Anything was better than the numbness of the cold. 

“Hey.” 

The voice pulled him out of his trance, and he stopped the punching bag with stiff hands, only realizing now that he’d bled through the bandages. He hid the grimace on his face as he turned towards the doorway. 

Tony was standing there, looking casual as can be in a hoodie, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his worn jeans. He rocked back on his heels when he met Steve’s eyes, a tired scrunch of laugh lines as he smiled. “Want some company?” 

“Did you want to use the gym?” Steve asked, voice hoarse. He cleared his throat and grabbed a bottle of water from the desk, drinking it all in one long pull. When he finished, he discarded the bottle, turning to give Tony a raised brow in question. 

“Not really,” Tony hedged, eyes darting down to Steve’s chest where he’d sweated through his hoodie and then settling his gaze on the bloody bandages. Tony frowned. “But I figured us fellow insomniacs need to stick together, especially if your way of dealing with it is beating yourself bloody.” 

“I wasn’t-,” Steve’s protest was cut short when Tony crossed the gym with a determined stride and grabbed his hand. He froze, a different kind of warmth filling him as he watched the way Tony’s eyebrows scrunched together in concern, a displeased twist to his mouth completing the picture. 

“So I’m guessing this is not your blood then?” Tony drawled out, raising an eyebrow at Steve, as if daring him to protest. 

Steve grinned, never one to back down from a challenge. If his smile was more exhausted than teasing, well only Tony was here to see it. “You should’ve seen the other guy.” 

“Right,” Tony rolled his eyes before pushing and shoving until Steve obediently sat down on one of the benches. Tony grabbed a fresh roll of bandages and a towel before he filled a small basin with water. He sat himself down across from Steve, both of them straddling the bench. 

Steve watched the whole thing as if he were in a dream, one hand holding the other and idly rubbing at the bandages, pressing onto it. There was no sting of pain. 

“You mind?” Tony asked, but grabbed Steve’s hands before he could answer. 

“It’s fine, Tony. I already healed,” Steve protested weakly even as he reveled in the way Tony handled him so gently. The skin-to-skin contact felt nice. It made him more aware of his body. Grounded, rather than floating in the gaping maw of the freezing ocean. 

“You said that if anyone needed you, they should come to you.” 

Steve blinked before he leaned in close, lips pressed together in concern. He knew he had his “Captain face” on, as the team liked to call it. “Is there something wrong?” 

Tony shrugged, but wouldn’t meet his eyes as he finished unwrapping Steve’s hands. He let out a hiss of sympathy at the blood before grabbing the wet towel and softly patting at his knuckles. “When are things not wrong?” 

“Tony.” 

Tony shoulders pulled up, his fingers tightening on Steve’s for a moment before relaxing. “The rain reminds me of Afghanistan. Water in general reminds me of it. Being waterboarded wasn’t exactly a walk in the park.” 

“Oh,” Steve breathed out, his free hand twitching at his side. He wanted to comfort, but he wasn’t sure how, not when he was barely functioning and lost in his own traumatic memories. “The rain sucks, doesn’t it?” 

“You could say that,” Tony responded lightly, sharing a grim smile with Steve. It was perhaps a morbid thing to bond over, but in that moment, Steve felt less alone. Tony finished cleaning Steve’s left hand then moved to his right, carefully unwinding the bandages and repeating the process. “I was down in my workshop- that’s usually how I deal with it, by inventing- when JARVIS told me you were up too.” 

Steve shook his head, reading between the lines. Tony had lived with his trauma longer than Steve had. He had tried and true ways to cope. This was less about Tony needing comfort, and more about Tony trying to offer Steve some company. “You didn’t need to go out of your way to check on me.” 

“And leave you to have a one-man insomnia party? Nah, I’d rather be here.” 

“I don’t actually have insomnia,” Steve blurted out, unsure why he’d offered up that bit of information. Maybe he really did need someone. Maybe Tony being here and sharing parts of his own struggles made Steve want to share as well. 

“Ah,” Tony hummed, a sympathetic note to it. “Nightmares?” 

“Sort of,” Nightmares were transient and fleeting. In the waking world, they could be ignored, but his memories were what haunted his dreams. Perhaps it was worse, knowing he could never forget. Steve looked down at their hands, marveling at how focused and gentle Tony could be, his tanned fingers wiping a towel against Steve’s lighter skin. “I just don’t like to sleep.” 

Tony let out a scoff at that. “Well Cap, if you have the luxury of being able to sleep, you should take it.” 

“If I sleep, I might not wake up again.” It hurt to say out loud, and Steve felt the words choking him as they left his mouth. 

Tony’s brows scrunched together and he stared at Steve before they softened into understanding. “You slept for decades.” 

“Yeah,” Steve responded, whisper-soft as he tugged his hands free from Tony’s. His skin was clean now, a little damp against the chilly air, but unmarred. It was almost like he’d been purified by Tony’s touch, changed for the better. He flexed his hand, feeling the pull of skin. His body could heal the injuries, they could purge the scars, but his mind remembered every bit of pain he’d suffered. “Sometimes I wonder if this is the dream. This new future with heroes and villains, magic and technology, and that I’m still in the ice.” 

Steve’s eyes were distant as he stared over Tony’s shoulders. “I don’t remember much from my time in the ice. Just the cold. But some days, I can feel it pressing down on me. I imagine that’s how dying feels like, caught in the moment and helpless to do anything about it.” 

“I’m gonna hug you now.” 

Steve’s eyes shot to Tony’s, taking in the determined expression and the pain in his eyes before Tony was leaning over and engulfing him in warmth. His hands flew up automatically, but they hovered over Tony’s back for a few seconds, unsure. 

“You’re alive now,” Tony’s voice was a whisper, a breath of soft air against his ear, and maybe that was what broke him. In the end, all it took was one man and a kind heart. 

Steve held him close, almost desperately, as he pressed his face into Tony’s shoulder. He let all the shivers run through him, the reactions he’d suppressed for so long, the mind-numbing cold that always made him want to tremble. Tony held him through all of it, letting out comforting shushing sounds as he rubbed a warm palm up and down Steve’s back. 

It felt like hours later when Steve finally pulled away, just enough to press his forehead against Tony’s. The man was practically in his lap now, and Steve registered the intimate position they were in but he was loathe to change it. He kept his eyes closed, gathering himself after such a vulnerable moment. 

“You’re warm,” Steve broke the silence, voice hoarse. His hands were still clenched in Tony’s hoodie, bunching up the fabric at his lower back. “You always remind me of fire. Of forges and the heat of metal on a summer day.” 

“That’s a really fancy way of saying you find me hot.” 

Steve jerked away, eyes wide and mouth open, ready to deny it. There was a smirk on Tony’s face, and Steve knew it was meant to be a joke to lighten the moment, but he could see the hints of insecurity, the tight lines around Tony’s eyes. He’d been honest all night, and to lie now felt like he would tarnish their moment together. 

Steve licked his lips, and bolstered by the fact that Tony’s eyes couldn’t help but dart down to watch, he leaned in close. “And if I did?” 

“Well then,” Tony sounded breathless, a little stunned if the sudden tight grip he had on Steve’s shoulders was any indication. “I wouldn’t mind warming you up, soldier.” 

“Good.” Steve was the one to cross the brief space between them, just enough to press his lips to Tony’s. The kiss was slow and almost drugging, languid and gentle. There were teasing licks, and sharper bites as they took comfort in each other. 

“Is that a yes?” Tony asked, hesitant for the first time since they’d started this. They had their foreheads pressed together again, warm breath touching sensitive lips. 

“Yes,” Steve said, and for the first time, it felt like it was a choice he’d made for himself, rather than for the greater good or because he had to. “Yes, to everything.” 

“Everything?” A hitch in his breath, a hint of vulnerability. Tony always wore his heart on his sleeve. 

“Everything with you,” Steve smiled and pressed a kiss to Tony’s cheek, letting the warmth linger on his lips. The cold waters felt so distant now, but it was still something they shared. “We’ll drown together too.” 

“I’d rather we keep each other afloat,” Tony’s hand cupped his cheek, tilting his head up until he could meet Tony’s eyes. “How about it? Wanna be my sexy lifejacket?” 

Steve let out a huff of laughter, his head pressing down on Tony’s shoulder, closing his eyes against the calm he felt. As if the storms had passed. “As long as you’re mine.” 

“Sounds like a plan.” 

They grinned at each other, hearts lighter and cheeks flushed with happiness. Outside, the rain slowly stopped. Dawn peeked out of dissipating storm clouds, and the world held its breath. 

Inside, they breathed each other in, and let the cold melt away. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys liked that! Truth be told, I was unsure on uploading the Steve draws fanart fic first because I tend to play fast and loose with characterization for the sake of humor (as that one was basically almost a crack fic). However, it seems I didn't mess up too badly on that last fic so that was a relief. I hope this one showcases the characters a bit more, I'm still getting the hang of their characterization. This fic is a better example of my style of writing if you guys are interested or curious haha. 
> 
> Thank you for reading, and I hope that you guys will stick with me through the last fic I have left. It's a wing grooming fic! And I shall upload it by the end of the week (probably as early as tomorrow tbh if ya'll want more Stony from me). If you liked this fic please do let me know! I am still learning the ropes, but Stony has been an interesting ship to write for. You guys are just so enthusiastic I was genuinely shocked (I come from fandoms that don't interact as much haha). Stony fandom is really hardcore wow. 
> 
> Thank you again for giving my writing a chance. <3 You can find my tumblr [here](http://lunastories.tumblr.com/). Feel free to drop by and say hi!


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